Telling Your Parents You’re Pregnant

Telling your parents you are expecting can be difficult at any age.  However, if you are a teenager telling them about an unplanned pregnancy, the situation can be down right terrifying.  A sense of shame, embarrassment, frustration, and fear may be felt by both you and your mom and dad.  Therefore, many teens hesitate and are reluctant to break the news.  Nevertheless, it is important that you don’t wait. 

Discovering that you are pregnant means some decisions will have to be made about your baby, your future, and your prenatal care. Ultimately, your parents have your best interest at heart and will want to be there to help you through this, even if they don’t necessarily want to get the news.  If you plan to keep the baby or find a loving family to adopt him/her, it is important to begin prenatal care as soon as possible to reduce the risks of birth defects and improve the the health of the pregnancy and the fetus.  Plus, pregnancy can pose extra risks to teens, as their bodies may not be fully developed.  Therefore, it is imperative that you come clean in a timely manner and consult with a medical professional for appropriate care. 

The worst part about telling your parents may be the fear of the unknown.  How will they respond?  Don’t wait for the perfect time to talk to your parents about your pregnancy.  Instead, just bite the bullet and tell them as soon as possible.  It is likely that you know your parents well, but still have no idea how they will react to the news.  However, preparing yourself for what to expect may make the stress of the experience easier to manage.  “Freaking out” is a normal reaction from any mom and dad.  There may be screaming and crying, as well as questions with regards to what you were thinking, who the father is, and how this happened.  The best thing you can do is take a deep breath and give them some time to settle down. 

After the storm has settled, there will likely be numerous questions about the pregnancy, the baby, and the future.  They don’t all have to be decided at that exact moment.  Both you and your parents need some time to process the information and think things through.  Should you have the baby?  Are you planning to keep it or place the baby up for adoption?  How will it affect your future with school and work?  Have you considered marrying the father?  How can you take care of a child?  These are all questions that need to be addressed.  However, it can be difficult to know what the best choices are for your situation.  Therefore, opening up to your parents and enlisting their help and support can make it easier to make these life altering decisions. 

Telling your parents that you are pregnant is not a fun conversation to endure.  They may have some mixed feelings about how this will effect your life and theirs.  However, when the initial shock is over, most parents are willing to offer their guidance and support at a time when you need it the most. 

If by chance, you are legitimately fearful of talking to your parents, due to an abusive or dysfunctional home life, you may want to turn to another adult for support.  A  family member,  neighbor, or school counselor should be able to help you with your tough decisions and assist you in finding the appropriate teen help resources that you need.

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